What We Learned From South Africa vs Mexico (1 – 1)


Initial Prophecies Were Inaccurate

Thank fucking Christ we don’t spend all our time internet spread betting or we’d be double super poorer. The ITV commentary team didn’t even wait til the match started before they apologised for the sound of the vuvuzelas. It won’t be the first. As usual the in-house ITV team are craptastic.

I also said I’d watch every minute. However, some of the first half was so thoroughly tedious I was compelled to watch it through closed eyelids in a state of somewhat unconsciousness. When I was actually awake, it did reek of a classic Blackburn/Bolton confrontation where you simply lose the will to live and quality football seems like an optional extra. It says something that the BBC highlights of this game didn’t start until the 50th minute.

The Vuvuzela Is A Rubbish Instrument

It looks like a poor quality plumbing product and it sounds like a broken kazoo, but the real failing of the vuvuzela is that it doesn’t leave you with anywhere to go. And as Shakespeare says (admittedly in Shakespeare In Love and not in any of his real works), “Where are you going to go when you meet the love of your life?” In the case of the vuvuzela your only real option is to shut the fuck up.

South Africa Should Have Been Braver

In the one good move of the entire match (all of three passes), South Africa gutted the mexicans and scored a genuinely class, smashed straight into the back of the net type goal. If only they’d have spent a little more time being a bit more ambitious and actually attacking Mexico, they would surely have won. Drawing this game won’t help them get through the Group stages. It looks like grabbing the game is the only acceptable strategy.

Mexico Are Lightweights

Like most of their boxers, Mexico are small, nippy lightweights. To succeed in football, they have to move the ball fast and with great control. South Africa didn’t give them the space behind the back four to run into and Mexico simply ran out of ideas. If South Africa hadn’t totally slept out the Mexican’s corner, they’d never have got back into the game.

Neither Of These Two Are Going Through

I can’t see either of these two getting past France or Uruguay, unless those two really fuck the pootch (which isn’t totally inconceivable).

One Down 63 To Go

2 Responses to “What We Learned From South Africa vs Mexico (1 – 1)”

  1.  Palace Blog » Blog Archive » What We Learned From Mexico vs France (2-0) Says:

    […] previous posts like this and this might have led people to believe that I thought the Mexicans were a team of lightweight losers who […]

  2.  Palace Blog » Blog Archive » What We Learned From The World Cup Finals Says:

    […] great opening strike was outstanding, not simply for the sheer elan with which he smashed it into the Mexican’s […]